Managing the Winter Cold - Shim's unqualified opinion

So kiddos, I've been laid out on my ass the last couple days with a really nasty head/chest cold that is running through the Bay Area.

I'm thinking lack of sleep, skydiving, and winter camping in the rain might have had something to do with this. But it got me thinking about my own tried and trued remedies of recovering quickly from a cold.

So for the weekend, I thought I'd offer up my totally medically unqualified opinion and see if E-Rock has any thoughts on this as well. FUN!

Jamba Juice

Necessary? Perhaps not, but whenever I call in sick (legitimately) the first thing I do is beeline for the nearest Jamba Juice. I order two things: the "Coldbuster" with an extra immunity boost, as well as a double shot of wheatgrass.

Wheatgrass is totally disgusting. When they grind it through the juicer, it looks like a giant green turd is squeezing out of a metal anus. It tastes even worse! Like "training wheels" with tequila, the kind folks at Jamba offer up an orange wedge to chase the taste with. And like the manly man I am, I sneer at their offer of oranges and take the shot like a... man.

Is it nasty? Hell yeahs. But for some reason I am convinced that wheatgrass helps my recovery. Just be sure to be within striking distance of a bathroom within 15 minutes of consumption, as wheatgrass has a sort of Drano effect on my digestive system. But I gotta tell ya folks, I feel like I can lift a goddamn bus after I take that shit down.

Theraflu

Oh man, Theraflu is money. Empty out that little packet into a cup of hot water and take it down. Instant recovery! I had some friends in college who got a little overzealous with the Theraflu. They emptied out a packet into a bong and smoked it.

I'm a bit skeptical about the health benefits of this, as they didn't bind it with baking soda or anything like that before smoking it. But hey, I'm not a professional. Maybe E-rock can weigh in on the benefits of this.

Pho

Vietnamese equivalent of chicken noodle soup! A little well done brisket and rare flank steak served with rice noodles, mung bean sprouts and Thai basil swimming in a delicious beef broth. Add some Spiracha and lime, and you got a little bit of heaven. It cures what ails ya. Matter of fact, the only reason I came into work today is that there's a kickass pho restaurant within 2 miles of my office.

E-rock's one of those "vegetarians" so will probably poo-poo my pho idea. I counter with one of the slogans from the American Beef Rancher's Association: "If God meant us to be vegetarians, why did he make animals out of meat?"

Well, E-rock? Got anything to say about that?

Daytime television

I think there's some sort of government conspiracy going on between the TV networks and the rest of corporate America. If daytime TV was any good, I'd call in sick all the time. But I gotta tell ya, having to choose between the "Tyra Banks Show", "Judge Judy" and reruns of "The Pretender" makes me want to go back to work faster than anything.

I fucking hate daytime TV.

On that note, time to be productive. I gots things to do today!

Ta,

-Shim